01 May 2006

The Ancient Vault: Gender Equality for Guys

(This post was written circa 2003/2004. It is part of the blog's one year anniversary celebrations.)

Before I start out, I would like to emphasize the fact that I support the gender equality movement. I abhor the discrimination against women and I believe everyone should be given an equal chance. However, there are some motions of this movement that I do not feel comfortable with as it borders on the extreme. Here, I'd like to talk about one of the least obvious problems: segregation of roles when it comes to partner relationships.

I know a couple who are friends of mine. About a month ago, they had an argument for which the girl, Sandy (not her real name) was responsible for due to her flaring temper and stubborn nature. They of course, separated briefly. My other friends (guys & gals) persuaded Danny (not his real name) to apologize and make up with Sandy. Although Danny shared my stand on equal responsibility in relationships, he relented, apologized and they both became an item again.

Sound familiar? Especially to all guys who are in relationships? Well, you're not the first. Strange, isn't it? With trust comes responsibility, and when women ask for equal chance and subsequently, trust, they should exhibit the same amount of responsibility. In relationships, why should men always be the one to make the first move? Why should men be the one to say "Sorry" even though both parties know that his other half is to blame? I'm not applying this to a universal rule, there are some exceptions, but for the most part, women expect men to be the "one".

And don't start talking about traditions. The whole purpose of the gender equality movement is to break away from traditions! If the woman is to blame for a specific problem, she should not feel ashamed to admit it and patch things up. Remember, guys don't have it any easier.

Moral of the story: Girls, take heed. Take charge of your life and use every opportunity to show that you are just as responsible as anyone by correcting your mistakes. Guys, if you ever find a girl as stubborn and uncooperative, try imagining what it would be like 10, 20 years down the road and take precautionary measures or you'll end up breaking everyone's heart.

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