04 August 2006

The Ugly Gorilla is Back

By "ugly gorrila" I meant Aguilera, as in Christina Aguilera. But they are so phoenetically similar that I'm sure you didn't notice.

When I saw her comeback single Ain't No Other Man, I was hopeful. I hoped, for one, that she has matured and gained control of her diva-worthy voice. Secondly, I prayed that her songs would be better. Unfortunately, no one seems to be answering my prayers. Ain't No Other Man, in my opinion, is one of the thrashiest pop songs I have ever listened to. Loud, jarring, and unmemorable. Even Ashlee Simpson and Paris Hilton have better tracks (and that's saying QUITE A LOT). I deleted it immediately.

Just a few days back her full album was released. I was initially hesitant but I figured I had nothing to lose by supporting piracy. Right now, I'm into track 4 and I'm still not impressed. She feels the need to express her songs in the highest decibels she can manage. As a result, my ears hurt when she sings and I could not appreciate the lyrics. She should go find Mariah Carey for lessons; at least she knows when to sing and when to scream.

Music-wise, it doesn't differ too much from Ain't No Other Man. If you like that song, the rest of the album will suit you just fine. She relies on repeating sentences over and over again in order to "create a catchy tune". E.g. "Back in the day, back in the day, back in the day, back in the day" or "Ain't no other man, (bla bla bla), Ain't no other man, (bla bla bla), Ain't no other man! Ain't no other man!"

Someone needs to give this gorilla a smack and tell her that choruses don't work that way.


Moses da gr8 said...

heya man.. since when did you take the simon Cowell position? hehehe... cool it down dude.. there's lods of Aguilera's fans out there, ready to strike you back. Anyway.. you said Paris Hilton song is better? wait til' you see the Video clips.. just like her very popular-home-made-video action! you might get confuse sometimes... was she selling her song or her... "move"? ;p

weeshiong said...

She should go find Mariah Carey for lessons; at least she knows when to sing and when to scream.

Please. It took Mariah something like ten albums before she stopped screaming. And that also probably due to her cannot tahan anymore.

Having said that, I don't really like Ain't No Other Man either. I was hoping the rest of the album would be better, the way Stripped was so much more than what Dirrrty had suggested.

ZemieN said...

moses: Nope I haven't watched either the home-made movie or the studio-backed version of her sex romps. Not in a rush anytime soon, either ;)

weeshiong: I agree it took Mariah aeons to master, so maybe she can give Christina some pointers. So we don't have to suffer through 7 more albums?

Yup, Stripped had some downright inspiring tracks. No such thing here.

I've finished the listening to the new album, and there are 1 or 2 notable songs, but that's not many considering there are 21 tracks on the double CD.