Africans and Their Massive 'Thing'

So there I was, brushing my teeth in the common bathroom, when this African dude walked in. He walked to one of the toilet cubicles, and started unbuttoning his pants. I'm witnessing all this from the reflection of the mirror, so I assume he's going to take a piss. But instead of going into the cubicle, he stood at where the cubicle door usually is and did his thing. He's actually standing about three feet from the toilet bowl!

I had to suppress my laughter as I didn't want to choke on toothpaste, but I am thinking, "Either he's got one freakingly long penis or he's a strong shooter." Or maybe both.

I think it is a common perception that all black people (Indians, Africans, African Americans) have huge appendages. But I doubt that. Sizes range from short to long, thick to thin, and I believe there are also black people with penises smaller than the average.

But still, if you gotta stand 3 feet away to take a piss...

'Randomly' Is A Predictable Pattern

Went for my first class today. The lecturer, a portly woman with a sense of humour, said that she wanted to emulate the real world with our project. Therefore, we will not get to choose our team mates for our project, and instead it will be done randomly. I'm hoping really hard right now that I'll get decent team members, but if things happen otherwise, I'll just have to grin and bear with it.

After all, 'random' is not really random as there are ways to predict the outcome using mathematical formulaes. I wonder how I can tip the scales in my favour...

At the end of the class, she asked us, "What do you think makes a good leader?" Earlier she had asked whether I had become a leader before, and I replied yes. Now she turned to me and asked, "Do you think you are a good leader?" I said yes as well.

She nodded her head and said that is a very 'optimistic' behaviour. I consider myself as 'confident', while others probably consider me as 'cocky'.

Actually, I'm all three.

Paternal Instinct

I'll be attending my first class of the semester today. Lectures have started so I have to catch up a little bit.

In the meantime, I'm hooked to another blog, Dooce. The blogger, Heather, is a funny and witty mother who blogs about her family life, especially her young daughter Leta. If nothing else, I implore you to read her Newsletter section. She archives her monthly newsletters to her daughter. Every month, Heather writes a touching yet hilarious letter to her daughter, profiling her achievements and behaviour over the past month. It is so adorable, and through her photos you can see how Leta is slowly growing up.

An excerpt: I look forward to this next month with you, to more coos and noises and near giggles, to more of the moments like the other night when I was feeding you at 1:30 AM and you kicked your sleeping father in the head. Your father and I love you more than you could possibly know, and you won’t know or understand just how much until you have a child of your own. Just please don’t have that child when you’re still a teenager. Which reminds me: You’re not allowed to date until you are 25. (from Dooce: Month Two Newsletter)

After reading through them I actually thought of having a baby. My paternal instincts were never strong. It's not that I dislike children - It's that I only like children when they're happy and laughing. But I'm beginning to think that those few moments of happiness is all I really need to warrant having a child.

Common Sense Advisory #1

Do not reformat your computer unless absolutely necessary.

I know too many people who think that reformating their computer is an easy way out of solving computer problems. I understand that they may not have the know-how to troubleshoot it cleanly, but reformating should always be used as a last resort.

Over the past couple of weeks two of my friends have reformatted their PC over trivial matters and ended up worse than before. One reinstalled Windows because the computer was a little lagging while playing videos. But he forgot to keep the audio card driver, and so had no sound for a few days. Another reformatted his C:, but somehow or other it also ate up D:, which contained precious photos and videos.

Of course, Common Sense Advisory #2 would be: Don't keep your precious photos and videos in one place. This guy did, and now he has nothing to replace those precious files.

115? That's All?

I'm back and all, but I ran out of good ideas to blog, so I did a quick and dirty IQ test. Unfortunately, I forgot that doing IQ tests require some time, even if it "quick and dirty". As a consequence, the time I spent there answering inane questions could have been better used to write The Post of All Posts. Unfortunately, that didn't happen.

Anyway, my results:

Your IQ Is 115

Your Logical Intelligence is Above Average Your Verbal Intelligence is Exceptional Your Mathematical Intelligence is Genius Your General Knowledge is Above Average

Leaving In My Proton

(sing to the tune of 'Leaving On A Jetplane')

All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go
I'm sitting here inside my room
I know you cannot wait to say goodbye

But the dawn is breaking, it's early morn
The laptop's locked up, protecting my porn
Already I'm so happy I could die

Cause' I'm leaving in my Proton
I do know when I'll be back again
Oh, Penang, I can't wait to go

And that's my farewell song to Penang before I live the (Dirty) Pearl of the Orient tomorrow morning. I've cut my hair very short, and I'm almost done packing my clothes. I'll need some time settling in, so expect no updates till Saturday.

The Merdeka Post

What does 31 August mean to me? Like many others, it's just another holiday. It's not that I don't appreciate the struggles of our founding fathers and mothers, but there's enough people crowding the streets already. So, as I told many others, my idea of being patriotic is not to cause more traffic jams on 31st.

Happy 48th Birthday, Malaysia.